Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Hair Therapy

I've been in a bit of funk lately. And by funk I mean full blown depression complete with fashion sensibility meltdown. Case in point: today I was wearing a plum and pink top with dark gray stripped pants and...wait for it...beige socks. I know! It's reached critical levels. Code red! Or blue! Or something.

Thankfully this only happens to me about once a year [Usually in winter when I haven't been getting enough of my vitamin sun, have been gaining my share of the freshman 15 without the tuition bills and am stressed out with holiday "cheer" about all the Christmas/birthday/ thank-you/bar mitzvah presents I have to buy that I don't have the money for].

Undercover Mother even gave me her reserve-for-dire-striates "Mary Tyler Moore chat" to snap me out of it. Somehow I'm feeling more Murphy Brown-in-the-dumps than Mary Tyler Moore-enthusiasm.

To top it off, I was suffering from a bad case of "cartoon hair" - hair so out of control that it could only be seen on a cartoon like Yugioh. I tried to tame my mane with a headband and bobby pins and hair spray with the remaining bit tucked back into a mini pony tail and more hair spray. Alas it was in vain. Or wait, is that me?

My coworkers actually asked my boss if I could go home "hair sick" it was THAT bad. So, I took my last $50 until pay day and got my hair cut. There's nothing like getting your hair cut to cheer you up. All it took was one Charlie's Angels hair flip and I'm back in action.

It didn't completely cure my funk. I promptly called a bottle of wine "fucker" tonight when half the cork broke off inside the bottle. And I'm currently devouring my second piece of cheesecake in 12 hours. But somehow, I think I'll make it after all.


Marvo said...

I'm not usually one for silver linings, but it could be worse. You could be devouring your twelfth piece of cheesecake in two hours. Also, I hope you showed that bottle of wine who's boss by drinking the whole thing, slamming the empty bottle on kitchen counter, causing it to shatter, and then saying to the pieces of glass, "I guess you won't be needing that cork back."

Frankly, Scarlett said...

Awwwww, honey!Would it help to say that I feel your pain?? Sadly though I can't afford a haircut until Friday. My limited funds until payday will be devoted to the sole purpose of getting me drowning my sorrows from now until then. Hang in there, Mary - I'll be your Rhoda!

Jami said...

I am convinced that all the hairspray that has been sprayed into the atmosphere is still there and is in fact responsible for making my hair freeze in a look of total shit for the entire day when the wind rearranges it for me on the way into the office from my car.