Thursday, January 25, 2007

Match Making 101: Pre-Pre Date Getting To Know You

When you find yourself on the receiving end of a well meaning relative/friend/coworker/minister/dentist who has a potential person of interest (aka PPI), you have a few choices...

You can:
a) run screaming from the house/cubicle/building/dentist's chair/confessional
b) graciously ask for more details as you're always up for meeting new people including cute pilots (or something...that was just an example)
c) think, here we go again and wonder what you did for karma to keep biting you in the ass
d) join a travelling band of ambidextrous ukulele musicians

If you opt for "b" you need to be prepared (actually, if you opt for "d" you also will need to be prepared). It's ok to get the basic details - age, height, maritial status and extra appendages. But any more requests for details and you'll be starting to sound like that chick from Murder She Wrote.

Next, comes first contact. Much like an alien invasion, you have to be ready - with your A game. (Not A, as in option "A" listed above because that would be counter productive at this point) but A as in all around amazing (the triple A).

Now I don't have to tell you that I have been on the blind date merry-go-round a few times before [*cough cough*]. And just like a carnival ride, my stomach gets all swirly and I wonder if I'm going to toss my meal.

It can also be exciting! The wind in your hair and the feel of the leather reins gripped tightly in your hands (if one is still on the merry-go-round). If not, it can still be exciting but you're also slightly apprehensive on how much of the "real you" to put on display.

Much like the scene selection on a DVD movie you've rented for the first time, pre-pre date getting to know you shows some of what you might want to see. But you're not sure whether you want to watch the whole movie (including credits).

Ok, enough with the comparisons (even I'm getting lost on my point, and there is one). Basically, I feel a bit rusty on the pre-pre date getting to know you bit. I haven't had to practice any "impression management" techniques in a few months (ok, ok 8 months - you're relentless!). And since we all know how THAT went, I'm left feeling like I don't know which side to put forward first anymore. Sure, I'm going to be the smart and witty redhead, that comes out no matter what I do. In fact, I'll probably be doing that in a neckline enhancing blouse, cute A-line skirt and heels. Ok, so he won't be able to see what I'm wearing while I'm typing my light and breezy "this is one smart and witty chick" email, but I'll know. And knowing is half the battle (according to G.I. Joe anyway...).

I am aware (enough with the emails!) that I take the independent woman role a bit far. So, I'm left trying to figure out how to balance the softer side without seeming helpless. Which I'm not. Or that I don't get hurt sometimes. Which I do [tear].

I recommend not taking the pre-pre date stuff too seriously. Both of you are probably wondering the same questions - will they like me, will there be [sparks/fireworks/no crying] when we meet and why did they wear one blue shoe and one black shoe. You know, your basic first meeting jitters.

Don't even get me started on the pre-date prep work. I'll save that for another post.


Anonymous said...

You're overanalyzing this. Don't pretend to be something that you're not. Simply go on the date and be yourself. If the chemistry is there, he will see you for the "smart and witty chick" that you are. Of course, if that doesn't work, show him your boobs.

Anonymous said...

Dating is exhausting.

Just reading that wore me out. ;)

Anonymous said...

Where can I sign up for option d?

Kirsten said...

You thinking too much. At this stage don't think at all. Relax, take a deep breath and repeat the following to yourself: "I am a very attractive women, with a great career, I have a humorous personality and no matter what happens I will be myself and go with the flow." Love your little sis

Erika said...

I'm not sure why everyone's names have switched to anonymous...I miss Beta. I knew I never should have switched!

Amy: Ah yes, the boob tactic. Good to know I have plan B.

Peter: You better get some more sleep :)

Anonymous #3: Not sure, but perhaps you should try the yellow pages.

Kiki: Really, I'm not thinking about it a whole lot. Just trying to remember lessons learned from the past while being my fabulous self :)

Amy said...

I was anonymous #3, not #1. I want to join the traveling band of ambidextrous of ukulele musicians. Sure you don't want to do the same?